First, I want to tell my beloved friends.
Not to worry for me and J. Because I have no intention of getting him back for myself.
And so far there is no way I can be with him when I am not ready for a relationship.
I am sure I am not ready, rejecting every one who tried to woo me
I WILL MISS LAODE FOR THE FOLLOWING TWO YEARS:)
Deep inside me, I know he actually don’t feel good with me for going ahead without him. Right? haha
A part of him wished I kept my promise, while another hope I pursue my own dreams and goals on my own pace.
To be frank, initially I was determined to wait for him to finish his NS before I start to plan for my Uni. But I heed J’s advice instead.
I decided not to tie myself knots by free-ing myself from the bond. A very bad way to explain this phenomenon is I ‘ll break my promise
Which is what I did in the end.
Though laode always say it is okay. It’s my life any way. But I know I’m at fault 😛
I can understand why he deleted his FB account,
I respect his decision made! And no matter what I will be there IF HE NEEDS ME ever 🙂
Provided he don’t [purposely avoid me or anything hahaha
One thing I hope he will not know forever is that,
He used to ask me if his head looks big, if you know what I mean.. .
to be frank, his head does look too big for his body. No pun intended.
There were times we tolerated each other’s temper.
There were times he shouted at me. I bet I’m the first in history to make him ever so agitated or angry ):
I admit because I was too disrespectful, I forgotten where I stand. And maybe because I was too blur, so even if teaching me certain modules will make his blood boil. But I assure myself , those were great memories haha!
I’m so proud of myself HAHA
Want to thanks him for being such a patient person. I am not holding any grudge. Just reflecting myself and our past.
Of course he treated me very very well. Times when I did my FYP, J was nowhere to be found, and Laode actually spent his Saturday with me in the lab.
Times when I was annoying and irritating, pushing his lecture notes aside while we’re mugging for our final exams. Trying to distract him by making him play card games with me. And he did! What a way to de-stress
He never fails to surprise me, he really must know why is he that amazing, I mean I don’t call him the best guy I’ve ever known for nothing right?
And not to mention he treated my clique umpteenth times of meals thru-out these three years urging us to eat more -.- (One of the reasons I am THIS FAT)
Those love, care and concern he gave his friends. Ask his every friend, I believe they’ll agree with me 😀
Especially me, I am so damn grateful for all he’s done. My birthdays, glowing sticks, candles, cakes, those gifts (Never say die- Tortoise esp), and outings together. And buying presents for the rest, we attended birthday parties, chalet, bowling, pool, buffet, theme park, the haunted house HAHA, cable car, Hort park, Playground, Kbox, ECP, WCP, BP (Bishan Park is funny HAH),night cycling, and many more! except overseas (not yet! )
When I say he’s my everything, please don’t get me wrong, I mean it! He took part in my life actively for the last three years, going 4 after next year April hahaha
And I will never regret keeping him as one of my besties till my last tooth drop. ( Maybe drop in 10 years times )
Though QAD and him bickers a lot, and I’m always in the middle. But I love it! 🙂 I finally understand why I can never define our relationship. Because He’s like my brother (both younger and older), sometimes like me pap, a friend, classmate, an elderly ( HAHA), a soul-mate, everything except a boyfriend or husband. I am a very fortunate kid to be able to know LAODE ❤
I don’t lust for him and vice versa so I am very glad and happy. I mean I hardly know any guys who don’t look at me with those eyes okay?! (like as if they very hungry or desperate D: )
I love how me and laode can communicate intellectually! Like how we don’t speak, (so used to each other), but yet can understand most of what we wanted to express.
In his eyes, I see freedom, dreams, love, silver (opps :x), fun, responsibility, peace and many more! With his presence, I can focus and study better, he’s just like my amulet! Definitely better than a boyfriend, very effective. HAHAHA
He is a natural and idealist. I extremely love being with him! Though he got his temper (may blow up any time), and he is LAZY! But me and QAD both love him to the core! Really thanks for the support you gave us, I think QAD will agree with me too! Without him, me and QAD will be stranded in most situations in class. But lucky I am attentive during lectures.. . 8D
So what? He scores better! I’m very proud of him and wish him all the best in his future endeavours. And if his plans for his future didn’t change, I will be expecting him to get married some 5 years later :p
I felt like my life’s not wasted on some bastard. Instead I spent them wisely because laode deserves my attention more than anybody. And of course QAD and some of my precious friends too!
Wish laode got a uhm happy time bonding with his NS mates, with his personality, I can foresee he will leave that place with too many friends to count, also hope laode will enjoy all Tekong training HAHA!
And I will pray for him to secure a place wherever he wanted. For him to live out his dreams, and his desired lifestyle. Also pray to God give him a very pretty wife *laughters echoing*
Alright, shall end it off here. Because seriously I’ve got never-ending gratitude and love for LAODE! ❤
My time is limited. Must learn to cherish people around me. I must.. .learn.
Today shall be the very first day in two years I’m gonna wait! Though I am not waiting for him with a purpose like I used to (to study together), now I’m waiting for him with a purpose! (to be the best of best friends AGAIN)
I will be a SIT graduate (I hope) by then he’s out!
Srsly, it is not like he will be going overseas, not coming back or what right? I’m a dumbo -.-
BUT WILL MISS HIM ANYWAY, EVERYWAY.
Counting down from now.. .