hahas.never have such fun long time lurh.now i can openly declare that i have two wonderful friends who will always be with me.oh it should be three.no maybe four.but wadeva the number is. it shows that im not alone=D
now i dont need to have uneccessary cuts on my hand anymore. i dont have to suffer in silence anymore. dont have to cry in the dark. sometimes i thought myself that i must be contended and thanks God for what he gave me and must appreciate it. but sometimes i really cannot help it feeling envious of somebody having what i dont have.im feeling abit confused bout whats actually on my mind.
because i was aloof and seem disinterest in things. i often caught staring into space by my friends.i seem to be very blur in other ppl’s eyes. but i wasnt actually what others see. i just dont know how to exactly express myself.
and because i was a perfectionist. i also want to appear good in front of others. so i always have to think before i really display any expression . so it results to often slow reaction .
i thought i gonna end up like that fereva.
but it end up unexpectedly that i can actually have friends who secretly cares fer me and helping me .they finally show up and encourage me not to give mysef up. though life can be real tiring sometimes. ppl wanna die or wadeva. who do not have this kind of experience before?
i also do.=DDD
but what we actually need was rest. ppl keep reminding and repeated us to keep balanced life.
to us, or to me, it seems long winded and extra.
but when we ask why .when we really ask why is life so tiring? why so we live here?
how do we come about? why are we slave fer life?
all answers was found in here.
a simple phrase [ have a balanced life. eat well. sleep well. play well. work well.]
means we dont have to die beacause sian or tired bout life. everyone say die. but what we actually do in end? we have a good sleep and wake up.all were gone.
we feel lack of things. time. place. anything.
simply because we do not have enough. so we must have a balanced life?
so we feel so full of everything that… … … we do not feel insecure or insufficient anymore?
and we wont feel like dying so much anymore?
we live to eat or eat to live? wadeva it is. they are linked.
so why not. answers are found from near eu and everywhere.
so from now on.DO NOT ASK ME WHAT WE LIVE FOR AND WE SHOULD DIE.
because pitying fer yourself is the most pity thing on earth. stop pity yourself and live well.
dont give up. thats what i get from friends.
dont think you have nothing. actually you have the whole world.
and my support >D
hehs.woots. ended.. ..